Because It’s All About Family

For the last decade or so Dianne and I have had the tradition of watching “The Godfather” on Thanksgiving Day. After all, the holiday is all about family. And, in fact, if you’re getting together with your loved ones this year, it may be time to settle all family business. As for the airing of grievances and feats of strength, those traditions are set aside for the next big holiday.

To celebrate the season I offer below a quiz to test your knowledge of what all right-thinking people regard as the best movie ever made. (The quiz may distract you from today’s other turkey as the Lions take on the Bears, two teams with three wins between them. And they’re not that good.) Enjoy and have a wonderful day.

The Godfather Quiz

1. What is the “gift” that Don Corleone gives to the undertaker in recognition of his daughter’s wedding?

A. “Justice” for his daughter.

B. A murder in revenge for his daughter’s rape.

C. The promise that all his future “business” will go to the undertaker.

2. Don Corleone:  “Someday — and that day may never come — I will call upon you to… 

A. “Do a service for me.”

B. “Come over to my house and make tomato sauce.”

C. “Wack a guy.” 

3. No Sicilian can refuse any request on….

A. Christmas Eve.

B. His daughter’s wedding day. 

C. Columbus Day.

4. Luca Bratzi: “I hope that their first child will be…

A. “A healthy child.”

B. “A girl.”

C. “A masculine child.”

5. The crooner who shows up at Connie’s wedding is:

A. Frank Sinatra

B. Tony Bennett

C. Johnny Fontaine

6. Don Corleone: “I’m going to make him an offer…

A. “Which is a very good offer.”

B. “He can’t refuse.”

C. “He might refuse if he doesn’t know what’s in his best interests, if you know what I mean.”

7. Tom Hagen is:

A. German Irish

B. Sicilian

C. Norwegian

8. The studio owner who wouldn’t let Johnny Fontaine in his movie wakes up in his bed with:

A. A prostitute hired by the Don.

B. The head of his prized stallion.

C. Mrs. Corleone.  

9. The Don does not want the family to get into:

A. Narcotics.

B. Plastics.

C. Derivatives.

10. The Don to his oldest son: “Never tell anyone outside the family…

A. “What you’re thinking.”

B. “Our recipe for spaghetti sauce.”

C. “Our long-term investment strategy.”

11. Why did Don Corleone send Luca Bratzi to meet with the Tatalias?  

A. To return a chaffing dish used at the wedding.

B. To make them an offer they couldn’t refuse.

C. To work out an agreement related to the narcotics business.

12. Luca Bratzi is greeted by the Tatlias with:

A. Cannoli.

B. A nice glass of scotch.

C. Piano wire.

13. The opening scenes of Godfather I take place in:

A. 1945.

B. 1954.

C. 1936.

14. “Luca Bratzi sleeps with…

A. “A horse head.”

B. “A night light.”

C. “The fishes.”

15. Clemenza: “Leave the gun.  Take the…

A. “Cannoli.”

B. “Anti pasta.”

C. “Lottery tickets.” 

16. Clemenza’s recipe for spaghetti sauce:

A. Start out with a little bit of olive oil, fry some garlic, throw in some tomatoes, some tomato paste, fry it and make sure it doesn’t stick, bring it to a boil, shove in all your sausage and meat balls, add a little bit of wine and a little bit of sugar and that’s my trick.

B. Add some garlic and some sugar to catchup, nobody’s gonna know the difference.

C. Screw it, just buy some Rague.

17. Kay is from:

A. Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin.

B. New Hampshire.

C. Brooklyn. 

18. The plan to retaliate for Don Corleone’s shooting is hatched by:

A. Sonny.

B. Tom Hagen.

C. Michael. 

19. Michael Corleone: “This is business, it’s not…

A. “Socialism.”

B. “Not business.”

C. “Personal.”

20. Sonny: “I don’t want my brother to come out of that bathroom with just…

A. “His dick in his hands.”

B. “His toothbrush.”

C. “Clean hands.”

21. The gun in Louie’s restaurant is hidden:

A. Under the bar.

B. Under the table.

C. Behind the toilet.

22. After Michael shoots Salanzo and the Police Captain McCluskey, the family goes to:

A. Disneyland.

B. The Hamptons.

C. The matresses.

23. After shooting Salanzo and McCluskey, Michael goes to:

A. Sicily

B. Santa Monica

C. Salt Lake City 

24. “In Sicily, women are more dangerous then…

A. “The Don.”

B. “Shot guns.”

C. “Grappa.”

25. Sonny meets his end by:

A. Paying the highest toll in the history of tollbooths.

B. Dying of old age and falling over on a stool in Italy.

C. Having a heart attack in his tomato patch.

26. Don Corleone responds to the killing of Sonny by saying:

A. “This war stops now.”

B. “It was business, it wasn’t personal.”

C. “They will all swim with the fishes.”

27. Appolonia learning English:

A. “Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Wednesday, Friday, Sunday, Saturday.”

B. “September, October, December, November, July.”

C. “Sometimes you win.  Sometimes you lose.  Sometimes it rains.”

28. In Sicily, Michael is betrayed by:

A. His wife.

B. His body guard.

C. His Italian Don.

29. Don Corleone is more powerful than the other Dons because:

A. He controls more politicians and judges than the others.

B. He is more ruthless.

C. He has figured out how to beat the house in Vegas.

30. The one condition that Don Corleone insists on to not break the peace is that:

A. The drug business is his alone.

B. Michael is not to be harmed.

C. Tatalia is killed.

31. Tom Hagen gets sent to Las Vegas because:

A. He couldn’t figure out the sauce recipe.

B. He wasn’t a war time counseliare.

C. It was good for his allergies.

32. Michael decides to be godfather to:

A. Connie’s baby.

B. Rosemary’s baby.

C. Baby Ruth.

33. Michael:  “Today I….

A. “Settle all family business.”

B. “Make this the first day of the rest of my life.”

C. “Decide to lose that ten pounds.”

Scoring:  Give yourself one point for every correct answer.

Over 30 points:  You ARE the Godfather.

20 to 30 points:   You are Michael.

10 to 20 points:   You are Sonny.

Less then 10 points:  You are Freido.

Welcome to the 281st day of consecutive posts here at YSDA. Thanks for reading!

The Answers: 1-A; 2-A; 3-B; 4-C; 5-C; 6-B; 7-A; 8-B; 9-A; 10-A; 11-B; 12-A; 13-A; 14-C; 15-A; 16-A; 17-B; 18-C; 19-C; 20-A; 21-C; 22-C; 23-A; 24-B; 25-A; 26-A; 27-A 28-B; 29-A; 30-B; 31-B; 32-A; 33-B


Published by dave cieslewicz

Madison/Upper Peninsula based writer. Mayor of Madison, WI from 2003 to 2011.

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