Devin Williams Looking for Dry Waller

Milwaukee Brewers pitching sensation Devin Williams is in the market for a dry waller.

Williams was at his Milwaukee area home after celebrating the Brewers’ clinching the Central Division on Sunday evening when, after a few drinks and in response to some unspecified frustration, he punched a hole in a wall.

“The whole organization feels for Devin,” said Brewers manager Craig Counsell. “Do you have any idea how hard it is to find a decent contractor in this market? It’s crazy.

“Like, my wife and I put in some new kitchen cabinets last year. I mean no big deal, right? It took two months just to get a guy to return our calls! I can’t imagine what Devin is facing right now.”

Brad Boxberger agrees. It may fall on Boxberger, who has struggled in September, to work the eighth inning because, in addition to damaging the wall, Williams broke his pitching hand.

“It’s going to take months to get that wall fixed.”

“We’ve all been there, man,” said Boxberger. “Toss back a couple of cold ones after a hard-earned victory. Then, hey, the remote doesn’t work. Bam! Before you know it, you’re on Angie’s List looking for some guy who knows how to patch dry wall. Thing is, and Devin’s got to remember this next time, I always kick the wall.”

Meanwhile, on social media, many Brewers fans showed a callous disregard for both Williams’ wall and his struggles to find a qualified repair person. Instead, fans focussed on what they saw as a foolish act that could well cost their team their best legitimate shot at a pennant since 1981.

“Yeah, I saw some of that,” said Counsell, referring to the social media buzz. “I wish the fans would just step back and put themselves in Devin’s shoes. Anybody can pick up the phone and get a surgeon to reconstruct your pitching hand tomorrow, but just try to find a dry waller.”

Welcome to the 225th consecutive day of posts here at YSDA. Thanks for reading!


Published by dave cieslewicz

Madison/Upper Peninsula based writer. Mayor of Madison, WI from 2003 to 2011.

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