This week’s quote comes to us from none other than Katie Wilson, mayor-elect of Seattle who said:
“I will appoint a cabinet of exceptional leaders whose lived experiences reflect the diversity of Seattle’s Black, Indigenous, Asian and Pacific Islander, Latinx/Hispanic, and People of Color communities as well as that of women, immigrants and refugees, 2SLGBTQIA+ communities, people with disabilities, people of all faith traditions, and residents from every socioeconomic background.”
Wow. That’s a pretty inclusive list. Who will she not appoint?
A) People who are only 1SLGBTQIA+.
B) People who are 2SLGBTQI+, but not A.
C) People who don’t have a clue what 2SLGBTQIA+ is.
D) Straight, white men.
2. In that long list of qualifications Wilson is looking for what is missing?
A) Competence.
B) Experience.
C) Good judgement.
D) Any of the above.
3. What does “lived experience” mean?
A) It’s experience that one has lived, as opposed to experiences one has had outside of life.
B) Whatever anybody but straight, white men want it to mean.
C) It’s what you say when facts and reason don’t support progressive policies.
D) Nobody knows.
4. Without looking it up now (you’re on your honor!), what does 2SLGBTQIA+ stand for?
A) Two salami low gluten bagels topped with quince in asparagus sauce plus chips and a drink.
B) Let’s just say if you enter that into the wrong app, well, have you seen the end of Dr. Strangelove?
C) Two-Spirit, Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer or Questioning, Intersex, Asexual, with the + covering anybody who feels left out.
D) Nobody knows. They just made it up at Oberlin College to confuse people and if you don’t get it, well, that just proves what a white settler colonialist oppressor you are, you scum.
5. Assuming, just for the sake of the next question, that the answer to the previous question is C, what does “Two-Spirit” mean?
A) Indigenous North Americans who embody both masculine and feminine spirits.
B) A double bourbon.
C) Both the Holy Spirit and the Holy Ghost.
D) The soul of a person with schizophrenia.
6. When Wilson promises to include “all faith traditions” she doesn’t really mean she’s going to appoint:
A) Catholics.
B) Evangelical Christians.
C) Jewish people who support Israel.
D) Any of the above.
7. As an exercise, let’s just say I’m a bisexual Black woman with Hispanic and Asian heritage and a disability who is in the country illegally and practices buddhism. What kind of job might Wilson appoint me to?
A) Streets Commissioner.
B) Planning Commission Chair.
C) Her replacement as Mayor.
D) Master of All the Universe.
8. Democrats lose elections that they should win because:
A) They genuinely want to be inclusive.
B) They’re looking for the most qualified people to fill public jobs and if they bring diverse experience so much the better.
C) They realize that diversity of experience should be just one factor in hiring decisions, but a factor nonetheless.
D) They talk like this.
Answers
1: D. She might also not want to appoint anybody in C, but that would exclude virtually everybody.
2: D
3: C is the most accurate answer, but B is also close enough.
4: C, but the gist of it all is actually D.
5: A, though B is a good choice for Democrats considering what Wilson’s quote does for their party image.
6: D.
7: D.
8: D.
Yellow Stripes & Dead Armadillos 