The Q&Q For 10/12/24

This week’s quote comes to us from none other than Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene who, in the wake of two deadly hurricanes in the last couple of weeks, tweeted (Xed?):

“Climate change is the new Covid. Ask your government if the weather is manipulated or controlled. Did you ever give permission to them to do it? Are you paying for it? Of course you are..”

1, Some conspiracy theorists claim that Democrats have been able to target the recent hurricanes at red states. Proof of this is:

A) All the hurricanes that have pummeled South Dakota in recent years.

B) All the crippling snow storms that have plagued Louisiana.

C) Damage from Helene hit Asheville the hardest, a city that voted for Joe Biden in 2020 by a margin of 60% to less than 40% for Donald Trump.

D) Marjorie Taylor Greene said so.

2. If Democrats aren’t controlling the weather then who is?

A) “The Illegals.”

B) International bankers (you know who we mean).

C) Childless cat ladies.

D) God.

3. Let’s assume for the sake of the next question that the answer to #2 is D. Why is God punishing red states?

A) She’s really pissed off at the Dobbs decision.

B) He’s sick and tired of having His name dragged through the mud as justification for every mean-spirited, looney toons notion that pops into the heads of unhinged nut jobs like Taylor Greene.

C) He believes that Kamala Harris’ economic plan has a greater chance of keeping the market rally going and, since He’s eternal, He’s got all his savings invested in securities.

D) He’s just curious to see how long they’ll keep invoking Him after He answers their prayers with His wrath. Will these people never get it?

4. Assuming Taylor Greene knows this is ridiculous, why did she say it?

A) She’s got to stay one step ahead of her base.

B) It keeps her in the news.

C) She doesn’t have to admit that the severity of the storms is linked to climate change.

D) Oh, c’mon, folks. Can’t you tell when I’m pulling your leg? You didn’t think I actually meant that B.S.? I mean, nobody’s that gullible!

5. Taylor Greene represents:

A) A mixed suburban and rural district northwest of Atlanta.

B) An urban district in central Atlanta.

C) A suburban district surrounding Atlanta.

D) The Wacko Region on the planet Paranoia.

6. If Biden and Harris can control the weather than why can’t they:

A) Get the cable and streaming companies to stop ripping us off?

B) Allow everyone to find a decent parking spot at Costco on a Saturday morning?

C) Get Elon Musk to just shut up for once?

D) Get the Brewers to make it through the first round of the playoffs?

Answers

1: D.

2: We’re going with D just for the sake of question #3.

3: All answers are plausible, provided you believe in 2.D.

4.: Only answer D is incorrect.

5: Technically, the answer is A, but really it’s more like D.

6: All answers are correct.